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Project Leader:
Pundit
Participants:
The WEbook community
Who Can Write:
Project Leader Only (Closed)
Category:
Poetry
Genre:
General
Language:
English

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Distressed

Three poems that make me think, twice!

Back into the Shadows, is a poem I wrote for my niece while she was having a hard time getting through adolescence. Tell Me How, is a poem I wrote to my siblings after losing my Dad to lung cancer, I felt they didnt care. Darkened Mind, is a sonnet, I wrote about how people who are insane must feel throughout thier whole life and how death is the only escape.

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Earlier Feedback

naiveandwitty

8/31/2009 11:42 AM PDT

You have my vote!

moxhp

8/30/2009 9:47 AM PDT

Voted.

http://www.webook.com/project/Top-3-Poems-of-Assorted-Interest

Jenny_Moxham

8/29/2009 10:21 AM PDT

A good effort. Voted.

If you have the time...

http://www.webook.com/project/Animal-Cruelty

Eviefay

8/25/2009 5:05 PM PDT

Enjoyed the truth contained in all three poems. A yes vote from me.

dantesfire

8/13/2009 5:49 PM PDT

Interestingly arranged trio, I hope you have success Dante

metric1

8/6/2009 1:58 PM PDT

I like these, I think I like darkened mind the best, I vote yes

http://www.webook.com/project/3-4-poetry-contest

tattyhead

8/5/2009 5:04 AM PDT

Good Luck.

http://www.webook.com/project/Three-for-the-competition

If you have time

Jade_Miseris

8/4/2009 9:46 AM PDT

I especillay liked Tell Me How

MarkBrad

8/4/2009 8:58 AM PDT

very nicely done, a great read

http://www.webook.com/project/My-Poetic-Thoughts-and-Rambles

jjbellinski

8/2/2009 7:27 PM PDT

Interesting choice to submit. You have my vote.

http://www.webook.com/project/My-Poetic-Trilogy

J_Keith_Haney

8/2/2009 1:41 PM PDT

All these sing of life's pain...and maybe even life's grace if you're strong enough. Such pain deserves to be spoken of. Only in the shadows do they thrive. Consider this a yes vote. Please consider mine as well. Take care.

http://www.webook.com/project/All-Damnations-Children

mikemurphy

8/2/2009 1:24 AM PDT

A yes vote.

Tigerprincess

8/1/2009 12:32 AM PDT

General:
I like this one better than the first one. It's easier to see what you are getting at! Very nicely done.

Form:
The structure is good but how about some punctuation? It tells you where to breathe...

Content:
The subject is raw but neatly dealt with.

Imagery:
Emotion paints a beautiful picture of the person you admire so much.

Tone:
Sad but happy at the same time.

Musicality:
This one flows beautifully. It reads well out loud and the rhymes are well thought out.

Tigerprincess

8/1/2009 12:20 AM PDT

General:
Not a bad attempt at getting your feelings across.

Form:
Simple and effective but you change rhyme scheme from the first verse to the second and it stops the flow slightly.

Content:
Interesting. This is a definite teenage poem. Darkness tends to be a popular subject when you are going through puberty...

Imagery:
It's not too clear what you are talking about here. Darkness is the only thing I can get.

Tone:
Sad, longing.

Musicality:
the change in the rhyme scheme spoils the flow too much.