General:
Even though he had a very limited formal education, my father had a great understanding of life. There were many bits of wisdom he imparted on me but the three most important were:

"Don't ever panic. Fear paralyzes you and you can't think."

"You must never be ashamed of who you are. Hold your head high and know you have value."

"Never become so attached to anything, or anyone that if you were to lose them, you would not be able to function and carry on."

The first one would save my life, more than once. The second would keep my self-esteem in tact, even in difficult times. And the third would enable me to maintain my sanity though the loss of many loved ones.

Originality:
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Tone/Voice:
Even though he had a very limited formal education, my father had a great understanding of life. There were many bits of wisdom he imparted on me but the three most important were:

"Don't ever panic. Fear paralyzes you and you can't think."

"You must never be ashamed of who you are. Hold your head high and know you have value."

"Never become so attached to anything, or anyone that if you were to lose them, you would not be able to function and carry on."

The first one would save my life, more than once. The second would keep my self-esteem in tact, even in difficult times. And the third would enable me to maintain my sanity though the loss of many loved ones.

Tone/Voice:
My father took me on a drive through Bakersfield California on a beautiful afternoon.  He seemed to have no particular place to go, and as he meandered through the different neighborhoods he casually chatted about the things we saw.  I didn't know why we were looking at peoples houses, but I was fourteen, the youngest of four and happy to have him all to myself.

He pointed out the beautifully manicured lawns and the shady tree lined sidewalks.  He admired the laughing children on bikes and a happy looking dog drinking from a fountain.   We picked out our favorite homes, the shiniest cars, and the nicest landscaping. 

I didn't notice exactly when our conversation had dropped off as we continued to travel.  But the world outside the car had gradully changed.  The homes became smaller, the yards grew sparse and brown.  Some of the cars had broken windows or missing tires.  He pointed out the bars on the windows, the grafitti on the fences and all the people that were sitting around with nothing to do.  One boy, a few years older than me approached the car and offered my father some drugs.  Without responding to him, the power windows went up, and my father made a right turn and headed towards home. 

He then talked to me seriously, and sincerely.  He said, "No one can tell you what kind of grades you'll get.  No one can tell you if you'll go to college or where you will work.  No one can decide for you who you will marry or if you'll have kids.  No one will choose which neighborhood you'll live in.  Only you can decide if you want lace curtains or security bars on your windows." 

Then he pulled the car over, turned his body towards me and looked me straight in the eyes.  He said, "I've been around a long time and I can tell you one thing."  He then looked out the window and said spoke his next words slowly and deliberately, emphasing each word in a way that couldn't have more deeply impresssed their importance upon me.

"The choices you make today, " he said, " will affect you for the rest of your life.  Think about where you want to end up, and make your decisions carefully."  My eyes were opened that day, to the awesome fact that I was in control of my life. 

I have seen, first hand, that a parent can condense a thousand stern lectures, worried glances, and sincere "I love you's" into just a few hearfelt words.  I know that it is possible to break through the apathy of a teenager.  I learned on sunny day in Bakersfield, that it is something truly magnificent to inspire a child.

My Father is the one that, though not intentionally, taught me what I should become.

My greatest moments as a child was watching Star Trek with my Dad curled up on the couch. I know how nerdy that sounds, but its true. Then during summer nights we would go outside and look up at the stars and talk about what could be up there. I always wanted to go into space because of that. My entire life that has been my greatest dream because of my Father.

Now I am a Funeral Director. Not the astronaut that I wanted to be as a child. This is because I lost my Father and my little brother when I was seven. When I turned thirteen I wanted to be a mortician so that I could help other kids like me with the losses of their life, and I have loved my job ever since.

A father is the one that influences what the child will be and what they will love the rest of their life.

What he says and does will influence what a daughter wants in life. My Father was a more rugged and 'manly' man, but he always would stop working set me on his lap, kiss my temple and tell me that I was the most beautiful little girl he has ever seen. It's stuff like this that creates a young girls self-confidence.

On the downside a father could be the reason why a girl becomes a prostitute, stripper or goes into an abusive relationship and doesn't leave.

Your father is one of the only people in a child's life that has the ability to make it seem as though all troubles simply melt away, just by holding you in his arms. He teaches you that love is unconditional and pure. He teaches you the things you need to become the best person you can be. He teaches you to be brave, strong, and yourself. My father taught me these things, as well as a multitude of other things that would take a novel to list, but above all, he has taught me to live as though everything I have could dissapear at any second, because it can. That lesson helps me love with a passon, work hard for all that I have, and live truly.

Originality:
It takes a child to love, but A Real Man to know why.

A man is there for his children whenever he is needed, But A Real Man knows he is needed for as long as his children are there.

A man who is not there for his children is never a loss because he never truly dies; he just eventually ceases to exist.

Perhaps the most important teachings you can do as a father to both your daughter and son, is that people are not perfect.  Your parents are not perfect, they make mistakes, they yell or get mad, sometimes for no other reason then that they had a bad day.  You, the kids, are not perfect and we shouldn't expect you to be perfect.  The phrase "try your best" means exactly that.  Try your best, don't shirk, but don't expect your best to be good enough all the time.  Life is about living, getting up each day and doing what you need..and hopefully, want to do.

This is fascinating.  You have something to tell.  I really enjoyed it.!

I believe the most important thing I can instill in my children is integrity. Do what you say you are going to do. Why? If you are boy growing into a man, it is crutial for you to not only fullfill your promises but know your limitations as well. Dont go out of your way just let someone down. For my daughter, I want her to measure her future mate to add up, not just speak the words to get into her little heart but for her to know a true gauge of how a man, father, is suppose to treat a women. Remeber all we will ever be measured on is what we say compared to what we did, bottom line.

This is a good idea. I think that most of us just assumed while growing up, that our fathers had no idea of what they were talking about. How on earth could they know what teenage girls were thinking? Then when we are adults ourselves, we realize that they knew alot more than they let on. I used to be jealous of my friends that had fathers who would hug them & tell them that they loved them, because mine didn't. But instead, my father made sure that we knew how to take care of ourselves, our cars, & our houses. It was his way of telling us he loved us. My friends had fathers who told them "I love you", but were never there when they needed them. My father would drop everything he was doing (still does!), & fix whatever we needed fixing, whether it was a broken heart or a leaky faucet. My father taught me the true meaning of actions speaking louder than words, & I hope that not only myself, but my siblings, can continue to share that lesson with our children.

a father, in my opinion, is supposed to be someone who is there for you no matter what. someone who loves you unconditionally and someone who treats you and yalls family with respect. he is supposed to be a leader. hetrosexual or not, what a father is supposed to be does not change

Originality:
love it it is so awesome i think you should win the nobel prize becauce its wonderful win you finish it i will tell all of my friendsd to veiw it and you will be best writer every that is why i am here so that i can incourage people to do better in their writing and so that it will actually make the awards and become a book and i think that this story should make a book and one suggestion is that it could be a little more romance because thats what the teenagers really want read and i mean like romance on the highschool level and so that they will want to tell their friends to go on webook and that they can say that was the best story they every read and that they were truly satisfied with the effort and work that was put into accomplishing that story and so they will embrace and love that story and that is what they are looking for in a love and romance story so think about the true feeling and meaning of love and romance so that you can reach that goal and accomplish your dream and so that you can become a good  writer or great writer even an outstanding write and when your story becomes a book you will look back and say that was the website that helped me and trained me  and thats why my story has become a book and thats the reason that its famous to day and i live in a mansion with a pool and thats why i am who i am today because i trained and i enjoy making people happy and thats why i love to write books aqnd thats whats emportant in my life today and thats what i love.

love it it is so awesome i think you should win the nobel prize becauce its wonderful win you finish it i will tell all of my friendsd to veiw it and you will be best writer every that is why i am here so that i can incourage people to do better in their writing and so that it will actually make the awards and become a book and i think that this story should make a book and one suggestion is that it could be a little more romance because thats what the teenagers really want read and i mean like romance on the highschool level and so that they will want to tell their friends to go on webook and that they can say that was the best story they every read and that they were truly satisfied with the effort and work that was put into accomplishing that story and so they will embrace and love that story and that is what they are looking for in a love and romance story so think about the true feeling and meaning of love and romance so that you can reach that goal and accomplish your dream and so that you can become a good  writer or great writer even an outstanding write and when your story becomes a book you will look back and say that was the website that helped me and trained me  and thats why my story has become a book and thats the reason that its famous to day and i live in a mansion with a pool and thats why i am who i am today because i trained and i enjoy making people happy and thats why i love to write books aqnd thats whats emportant in my life today and thats what i love.

I think that fathers are supposed to teach their kids is honesty. Because if you don't have honesty in your relactionships you don't have anything.This goes for kids to cause if you keep it real with your parnets they won't keep it real with you . it starts with parties. If a parnet isn't there and you tell a lie. what if your dad finds  out. he's problely not going to let you ever go out agin.so now you think he's mean. so parenets yes dads to teach your kidshonesty.      you

<a href="http://www.starruby.in/store/emeralds";>Loose Emerald</a>

“Nowhere is this failure [of education] more evident than when it comes to antigay prejudice, and nowhere is that particular failure more manifest than it is in our elementary schools.”

“Acknowledging children as sexual beings or allowing males (particularly homosexuals) to teach in elementary grades dislodges the classroom from the ‘safe haven’ of heteronormativity.”

“Boys don’t have to stand to urinate (nor do girls have to sit–they could squat), that’s just how they got conditioned.”

“Assumptions about children’s ‘innocence’ regarding sexuality are outdated.”

All of the above quotations are taken from Queering Elementary Education: Advancing the Dialogue about Sexualities and Schooling, a 1999 book for which Obama’s “safe schools czar,” Kevin Jennings, assistant deputy secretary for education who heads the Office of Safe and Drug-Free Schools, wrote a foreword.  

Jennings “called for elementary school children to explore their sexual identities, for teachers to incorporate homosexual themes in grades K-5, for discarding a ‘hetero-normative’ approach to education and for ‘acknowledging children as sexual beings:’ ” http://bit.ly/3b3GGU.

Jennings is the founder and president of the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network.

The lead quotation above is also taken from his foreword, the other three from contributors to Queering . . .

If I may be so presumptuous as to summarize the contents of a book I’ve never read, it’s a work intended to subvert the innocence of children in the interests of furthering the agenda of the homosexual lobby.

I base that presumption on a passing acquaintance with Jennings in the sense of knowing his history.  See previous articles about this gem of an Obamaczar, http://bit.ly/3kkzGt and http://bit.ly/Loo9u.

Not on his resume’ is his advising a 15 year old boy to wear a condom during his assignations with an adult, male pervert while Jennings was a teacher in Barney Frank’s Massachusetts.

He has since apologized for that violation of the law, which apology was evidently more than sufficient to Obama since Jennings is still on the job.

In related news, the White House has decided that Obama’s 18 new czars won’t testify before Congress to discuss the constitutionality of their appointments.

RINO Senator Susan Collins was even dismayed by that refusal http://bit.ly/18IjBs. ;

I don’t know why.  Czars like Kevin Jennings might be asked questions such as, “With a record like yours, how do you dare pretend to be concerned about safe schools?  Safe for whom?”

Jennings’ response: “I prefer not to answer and I invoke my Fifth Amendment privileges.”

Finally, the always reliable United Nations has leapt into the decency versus homosexual fray via an “official report.”

“UN ‘Special Rapporteur’ Martin Scheinin recently filed a report with the UN titled ‘Protection of Human Rights and Fundamental Freedoms While Countering Terrorism‘ in which he states that human gender is not a fixed thing but a mere ’social construct’ that is ‘changeable over time:’ ” http://bit.ly/18IjBs.

In my ignorance, I always thought that men were men and women women.  I believed too that terrorism and gender had no interrelationships.

What do I know?

Ah, but Martin Scheinin and the UN know.

The good people in that anachronism on the East River, not content with messing up the planet, are now engaged in re-arranging genetic constructs and linking their absurdities with terrorism in an obvious effort to cater to the gay rabble.

I’d love to know Martin Sheinin’s sexual identity.  We definitely know Kevin Jennings’.

i am only still a child so what i might say might not have the same opinion i do but at least you are hearing from someone who is closer to a child then an adult. i think you need to teach your kid not only things like sports and stuff like that but how to tell the truth and be an adult. for instance life lessons or how to be responsible. you also need to let them have experiences. i no sometimes im embarressed of my parents bbut i dont think i would be here today without the lessons they tought me, and everyone has thier personal veiws so you and someone else might raise their children different ways but i beleive you should teach them how to be a good person instead of how to smile for your first mugshot. well i hoped i helped.hope you get some good comments!

Boy, so much depends on the situation that faces each and every family.  I have four sons, now men. My dad passed when I was 15, our relationship was not good, he drank and got nasty and it was not good.
Sometimes he would wake me up by throwing water in my face at the age of 10, he sat me down once while he was drunk and said son, here are the facts of life.  While he was in the middle of eating a pigs knuckle and having a Bud, at 9: am he said.
If a girl wants you to do something to her do not do it, but if she wants to do something to you, let her go right ahead.
The last memory I have about me and my dad was why I was not crying at his wake, like everyone else, I wiped spit on my eyes to make it look like I was crying.
But as a kid growing up in an apartment house in the Bronx, NY, I for some reason always watched how other kids were treated by their parents- and they also did not have it so good so I said, hey that's the way it is.
The strange thing was that my dad was a reliable man, he always kept his word and he was very witty and smart.  He gave me a weekly allowance for chores and I used the money to go to Yankee Stadium on Sunday's to catch a double-header- 1.30 cent, was all it took to see two ball-games..
Fast-forward some 30 years and I am a dad four times, four boys- What kind of dad will I be, my role models were not to good, what to do?
Well, I read somewhere -What is Father?
He's a tired grin in the evening
He's a happy hello in the morning
He's the leader of the clan with  smile in his heart
He's friend,adviser, teacher, pal
He's the greatest man in the world

So many kids today in America, have no idea who their dad is and look at the disaster that has done to the American families.
I am new here, I have never written anything except what comes to my mind.  I am by no means a writer, but I do enjoy writing. So please put up with my grammatical unskilled writing.

Bravo!!!!  I couldn't have said it better myself. THIS is the very reason the project leader advised me to remove my entry as it was not "appropriate' But it was true and the truth hurts.

Keep banging on the door!

Take care, Susan

I always remember my first memory of my dad and it is when he left a foot inprint on my mothers face. I was three years old. Since then i was never close to my dad because he always used to beat me and my sisters, there was four of us he would never hit my second oldest sister only because she was his own blood and never my youngest because she was too young but i was his own blood n that never stoped him from hurting me. The memories i have to deal with is hard enough but the fact that i cannot speak about them with anyone is hard enough. Growing up i knew my farther was different he used to boast about kicking young children underneath the table at any wedding partys because their parents were useless or shouting that my mother is a whore. No im not old i am only 21 for my age in this generation i have had to deal with beatings, rape, insecurities, neglagance, and yes my spelling is not that great because i never went to school but i feel strong and happy only because i cannot live a lie anymore, i have had support and strength from alot of people and i thank them for it. All these few words mean nothing to alot of people but to me they mean miles so please take your time and read these few words because out in this world there are worse off people than you and me.

Fathers are supposed to teach their kids that is alright to make mistakes. That no one is perfect, no matter how hard they try. And that no matter what they do they will always love them, because that is their kid. they might not always like what they do or when they do it, but they will get over it because they love them so much, and dont want nothing bad to happen to them, so they protect their kids and try to sheild them from danger. they also show their kids wha love is, so they will know how to love, and when they finally find that special someone one day they will know what love is.

DAD~!~

http://www.parentdish.com/2009/09/16/little-girl-throws-ball-back-after-dads-dramatic-catch-at-phill/?icid=main|hp-laptop|dl1|link4|http%3A%2F%2Fwww.parentdish.com%2F2009%2F09%2F16%2Flittle-girl-throws-ball-back-after-dads-dramatic-catch-at-phill%2F

I love this concept!  In our fast-paced society, it's often hard to make time for the people who mean the most to us and to remember all of the good words of advice and support they've given us.  This is a beautiful project that is sure to inspire many and remind us of the simple things in life that are the most influential and important.

I love this concept!  In our fast-paced society, it's often hard to make time for the people who mean the most to us and to remember all of the good words of advice and support they've given us.  This is a beautiful project that is sure to inspire many and remind us of the simple things in life that are the most influential and important.

**You're at it **

Welcome all ... While your at it, please have a look at the project forum. Let’s discuss what we have going on here ...
Thanx,
jfx

The Life of Basketball, Applying It to Real Game Situations:

One Day recently my twelve year old son and I were working on some basketball drills in the back yard.  What I didn't know was that it would become a wonderful teaching moment. 

     We started out going the basics: lay-up drill, free throws and dribbling with the right and left hands.  After about 15 minutes, my 12 year old starts to complain about the heat and what he wanted and thought we would work on, shooting threes and working on creative crossover dribbling moves.  "No son", I said.  "Be patient because you need to focus on getting the basics down first or you won't be able to do the other complicated skills correctly of effectively."  He wanted an explanation.  Seeing the moment arrive, I seized it.  I began to talk about how the same logic applies in school.  We got into a conversation about how math builds off of simple skills taught in the early primary grades.  I stressed that if he struggled in those grades, he would have to work extra hard to catch up in the middle grades he just entered.  He agreed.  All the while we finished our "basic" drills.

     Then we began to talk about why it was necessary to learn to dribble and shoot with both hands.  He questioned it because it was hard for him.  He is left handed and therefore shoots left handed, but his best dribbling hand is his right hand.  He was getting frustrated because he was having trouble laying the ball up with his right hand.  I again seized this opportunity by the horns.  "Son", I said.  "Do you know what a "man" and "zone" defense is?" He didn't.  When I explained that a man defense meant someone else will try to mirror every move you make and go where ever you go to break your concentration and a zone defense is where they cover an area or "zone" on the court as a strategy, he seemed confused.  So I explained to my son that life is the same way particularly when dealing with people.  Sometimes you have to play "man defense" with people.  As a parent I told him that there are times when I have to stay on him about his grades or his chores because I know in the long run they will help him be a better man.  However, there are moments where I have to step back and play a "zone" defense and let him just grow up because sometimes you have to give the "shooter" some space to see if they are "making or missing shots" on a particular day.

     Then we started combining drills because I told him that life throws you "multiple looks" that may confuse you.  When this happens you may have to think on the fly and give life your own "multiple look" to confuse life right back.  So I set up a cone and threw him a pass.  I told him to get the ball and pump fake like he was about to shoot a 15-foot jump shot (essentially a free throw), but instead dribble the ball to the basket and shoot a lay-up which is the easier shot.  It was a great learning experience!  So we decided and learned together that you learn enough basics so you can put them together to become more complex.  The irony is that being more diverse and complex actually makes it easier for you in a game, in school and in life. 

     Just the other day, my son was playing basketball with some neighborhood kids and he came home happy that these new moves and skills made his game so much better.  "They couldn't stop me dad", "The game was easy." 

     Now he can't wait for our basketball lessons.  I can't wait to have more teachable moments.  Sports make it so much easier to be a father to my children!

For those folks who have posted their stories directly into this feedback chain, go ahead and click the orange Start a New Article button.  Then cut and paste your work and submit it so your piece can become part of the running list to the right.  Lemme know if you need help doing this.

Thanks!

A time to remember my Wonderful father with a twinkle in his eye for everyone. When he spoke to you he made you feel as if you had all of his attention and that you were the only one in the World. We had a bond between us that none could come between us, if I thought of him he would call me or come walking through my front door. The same thing happened if he thought of me, I would go to the telephone and call him to hear his voice lift with love and I could feel his smile and the love he had in heart for me.
  My Father was a very special Man. He was a Man of the World and of Wild life. He served in the Army, the Marines and then made a Career in the Merchant Marines. He loved to travel and he loved living on the Sea, working and fishing for food for his crew.
  He loved everything about life from the Sunset to watching the Stars come up in the sky with the Moon illuminating the night. He was out to Sea for nine months out of the year and when he came home he would wake me up at five in the morning to go fishing or hunting squirrel and rabbits in the Country. He was a Man who lived off of the land, he grew his own corn, tomatoes, beans and potatoes. He was a very humble man who loved life and taught me how to love life and how to respect life. He taught me never to take a life unless it was to be used for food. He taught me to love flowers and watch the Four O'Clocks bloom at four o'clock at almost the exact time every evening. He was fascinated by this flower and would drive me to his friends or his Mother (my grandmother's) to watch their flowers open every evening never wavering in his love for them. He finally began growing his own plant and it grew many years blooming at four o'clock with my Father sitting on the porch smiling as they slowly opened up at four o'clock.
  He was a Man of his word and never let you down. He taught us honesty and truth was the way of life and that love was the most important lesson in life that you could learn.
  I will never ever forget my wonderful Father and all of the lessons of the simple beauty of every living thing in this world. He even had an old Bull frog that he let live in his basement and in the night you could hear him croak through the house. His sounds soon touched your heart as his croaking lulabyed you to sleep.
  My Father never had any enemies but he had many friends that knew they could count on him for anything. He was the most handsome, beautiful and kind hearted Man that I have ever met in my life. Thank you for being my Father, I love you Dad. Happy Fathers Day in Heaven. I miss you with all of my heart, but I feel you with me sometimes in the day when I am outside talking to you and know that you are with me in Spirit.
Love,
Tamara Lesley

The commenter below's words really speak to me. I almopst cried. I'm sorry about your dad.

My father died a few years ago after a lingering illness. I was not in the country to attend his funeral so I read his obituary online. I signed the guestbook and gave a few personal thoughts about my father as a man, and as a provider. When I was a boy, my father was not one to play with his kids. He had lost an eye while in the Navy and this setback was too debilitating for him to overcome. Sure, he would support us in our endeavors: baseball, softball, bowling, football, cheerleading ,etc. But he never participated, only watched.
My father was a quiet man, he was the yin to my mother's yang. He was affable, something I inherited from him, and would study people before speaking. I am now in my 50s, and not until in my late 20s did my father ever tell me that he loved me. In my 30s I decided to return to college and complete my education. My father told me how proud he was of me.  Just those words, coming from a man who only wanted to watch, meant the world to me.
When my father died I was living in China. The night he died I felt a hand touch my forehead. I sat down and looked in the mirror wondering what it was. A few minutes later it happened again. A simple touch on the head. Sort of like a blessing. I learned a few days later that my father had passed away. I believe he was telling me goodbye.
He was a good man, with many friends. The one thing he taught me came from the way he lived his life. His blind eye held him back and that taught me to push forward and make the most of what comes my way.

Here's what my father taught me:  don't expect much from people.  He did it by repeatedly making promises and emphasisizing how a man was as good as his word.  Then he'd break his promise. 
This probably sounds cynical.  But stop and think about it.  I grew up knowing that a man who actually kept his promise was a treasure.  And hard to find. 
I also learned to love a man with flaws.  I expect people to be imperfect.  Did this not put me ahead of the curve? 
Thanks, Dad.

Wow, a really nice and original idea! :D Well done! :D