Book Info
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Project Leader:
northstar
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Participants:
The WEbook community -
Who Can Write:
All Participants -
Category:
Non-Fiction -
Genre:
Memoir/Narrative Non-fiction -
Language:
English
book_central
Heavens Journey-My Secret Diary (short stories)
A Secret Diary a memoir narrative. Carol's Journey is a story about her chaotic life style which includes a list of numerous foster homes, children homes, a convent, and multiple step-families.
She must learn how to cope from a perpetual whirlwind of instability that foreshadows her past, present, and future. Most of all Carol learns that 'Love" can build a bridge to the most basic fundamental need of human existence.
In Kiminsky, Indiana 1976 Carol's parents pursue a divorce thus begins ... more »
She must learn how to cope from a perpetual whirlwind of instability that foreshadows her past, present, and future. Most of all Carol learns that 'Love" can build a bridge to the most basic fundamental need of human existence.
In Kiminsky, Indiana 1976 Carol's parents pursue a divorce thus begins ... more »
GIVE FEEDBACK
I'm very very unsure how to rate this. I'm used to rating stories where I feel ok picking them apart but if I pick this one apart it would be your actual life being picked apart and that seems unfair! The writing is solid as far as I can tell though the tone feels awkward to me simply because I'm used to atuobiographies being somewhat more serious and systematic whereas yours is all over the place while still organized and a little unorthodox. It shakes me simply because it isn't what I'm used to but that can always be a good thing. I feel saddened that I don't have a ton to say like I usually do but I guess that means I don't see much here that is in critical condition. Your life is your life, just make sure this doesn't become your personal dumping ground for stress and keep it entertaining, as you've done.
General:
You have a lot of simple, easy to fix errors in your chapters, but they are not distracting from the realistic picture you paint with your writing.
Originality:
Nice
Tone/Voice:
beautiful
You have a lot of simple, easy to fix errors in your chapters, but they are not distracting from the realistic picture you paint with your writing.
Originality:
Nice
Tone/Voice:
beautiful
Wow....well, there better not be any plot twists after THIS lineup.
Yes I have to joke so I can sleep at night.
Yes I have to joke so I can sleep at night.
This Feedback was...
Very interesting. One of the things I really look for is a story or summary's ability to keep me engaged and this did that. I don't know the character yet but I am really, really rooting for her. Can't wait to keep reading.
let me change that to a nine out of ten. The deeper I get into it the more engaging it is. Kudos.
This Feedback was...
I see a great deal of potential. All the parts are there for an engaging story. I certainly want to read more when it is complete. Some observations that may help- obviously you need some editing, get rid of superfluous wordage, be more imaginative with your prose, consider how it reads as well as the word you choose. Your chosen words are perfect, I think you could form them in a way that would be more engaging. I give it an 8 of 10 simply because of the potential that is there.
This Feedback was...
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