Book Info
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Project Leader:
MarkBrad
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Participants:
The WEbook community -
Who Can Write:
All Participants -
Category:
Poetry -
Genre:
General -
Language:
English
book_central
My Poetic Thoughts and Rambles
I get great enjoyment from my writing. If others enjoy it too then that is a real plus. I welcome criticism as it can only help me advance as a writer.
I think I would still have a need to write, even if it were never viewed by others, though there is no better feeling than knowing you have occupied another's mind, even if only for a passing moment.
I think I would still have a need to write, even if it were never viewed by others, though there is no better feeling than knowing you have occupied another's mind, even if only for a passing moment.
GIVE FEEDBACK
8/31/2009 4:59 AM PDT
Lovely imagery in these three. I did like the inclusion of the pics, however don't feel they were a necessary addition. I feel your poems on their own give us enough imagery.
Well written poems. You have my vote. Best of luck!
Well written poems. You have my vote. Best of luck!
This Feedback was...
8/30/2009 5:09 PM PDT
your poetry is really beautifully written - i love the rhyming and how it just flows really effortlessly. also i love the photos within the poems - it just adds something extra to make the experience of reading your work more special! Publish! =)
thanks for voting for me by the way! xox
thanks for voting for me by the way! xox
This Feedback was...
8/30/2009 12:22 PM PDT
I love the rhythm and flow of your poems. The diversity is also a plus. Publish!
This Feedback was...
8/29/2009 9:27 AM PDT
This Feedback was...
8/28/2009 3:49 PM PDT
your pictures mirror your words beautifully, well done
This Feedback was...
8/28/2009 3:47 PM PDT
Lovely....the flow of this was wonderful love the last stanza in three years...nicely written. You have my vote
This Feedback was...
8/28/2009 11:20 AM PDT
Each poem is well constructed, and I especially like of the two how you used pictures to accompany your imagery. Nice work.
You have my vote and support. Good luck.
You have my vote and support. Good luck.
This Feedback was...
8/27/2009 1:48 PM PDT
Good luck with the vote! Love these poems
This Feedback was...
8/26/2009 12:38 PM PDT
All of them have fantastic imagry and they flowed effortlessly. A couple hang ups in the secret garden, but other than that I can find no reason why you shouldn't have these works published. Great job.
This Feedback was...
8/25/2009 8:51 AM PDT
well.......if you really are the man in the photo........u r so much like my grandpa.
when u commented 'well done' on my poetry.....it somehow felt very sincere and good.
thanks a lot.
and i like your poems....esp the secret garden.
i have always dreamt of some naturally beautiful repose.........and your words today sketched my dream garden for me.
thank you for the beautiful garden.
u definitely have my vote.
and to anyone who reads this :
http://www.webook.com/project/Melancholy-solitude
thats where u can read some of my poems.....and comment at least...if not vote !!
when u commented 'well done' on my poetry.....it somehow felt very sincere and good.
thanks a lot.
and i like your poems....esp the secret garden.
i have always dreamt of some naturally beautiful repose.........and your words today sketched my dream garden for me.
thank you for the beautiful garden.
u definitely have my vote.
and to anyone who reads this :
http://www.webook.com/project/Melancholy-solitude
thats where u can read some of my poems.....and comment at least...if not vote !!
This Feedback was...
8/24/2009 5:58 PM PDT
I love the first two poems, Great job
Publish
If you would please:
http://www.webook.com/project/Oppression-Hope-Freedom
Thanks
Publish
If you would please:
http://www.webook.com/project/Oppression-Hope-Freedom
Thanks
This Feedback was...
8/24/2009 7:31 AM PDT
This Feedback was...
8/24/2009 7:24 AM PDT
Wow!!!
How did I miss this on the first run?
Excellent use of language, wonderfully descriptive narrative, and perfectly tuned to twang those heart strings.
An all round, polished poet.
Excellent work and the very best of luck for the competition.
How did I miss this on the first run?
Excellent use of language, wonderfully descriptive narrative, and perfectly tuned to twang those heart strings.
An all round, polished poet.
Excellent work and the very best of luck for the competition.
This Feedback was...
8/23/2009 11:52 AM PDT
Form:
most excellent!
Content:
filled with such wonderfully sensitive emotion! a true love story well done!
Imagery:
I could clearly see this lady standing each day gazeing out to sea, with longing for the man she loved, to return.
Tone:
absolutly hearbraking at the start and then bursts into joy! well done!
Musicality:
lyrical to the max! This is a REAL man ladies! a prize catch lol one who REALLY knows women and can express such sensitivity so CONFIDENTLY! got MY vote sir!
most excellent!
Content:
filled with such wonderfully sensitive emotion! a true love story well done!
Imagery:
I could clearly see this lady standing each day gazeing out to sea, with longing for the man she loved, to return.
Tone:
absolutly hearbraking at the start and then bursts into joy! well done!
Musicality:
lyrical to the max! This is a REAL man ladies! a prize catch lol one who REALLY knows women and can express such sensitivity so CONFIDENTLY! got MY vote sir!
This Feedback was...
8/21/2009 2:39 AM PDT
very good, yes vote from me
This Feedback was...
8/20/2009 1:28 PM PDT
Truly, truly wonderful and sweet. A vote from me.
This Feedback was...
8/20/2009 8:05 AM PDT
Three wonderful, diverse poems that deserve to be included in the published anthology of WEbook poetry.
Edit...
Secret Garden
"marigolds and flocks..." should be "marigolds and phlox..."
not sure what "gunnera" are
Edit...
Secret Garden
"marigolds and flocks..." should be "marigolds and phlox..."
not sure what "gunnera" are
This Feedback was...
8/20/2009 5:48 AM PDT
This is truly beautiful work, i'd love to see this make it to the published pages! You have my vote, best of luck!
http://www.webook.com/project/Troubled-Waters-Poetry
http://www.webook.com/project/Troubled-Waters-Poetry
This Feedback was...
8/20/2009 12:14 AM PDT
Best of luck
This Feedback was...
8/19/2009 8:14 PM PDT
Content:
Thank you for Voting for my poetry. I wanted to return the favor for you. I read 'Secret Garden' first and was blown away by it. I loved how you added the beautiful pictures and they and the words took me to your secret garden in my mind. I could see it in all of it's glory. I loved all of your poetry, you should be or are already published somewhere. A writer as good as you should be published to share the beauty of your words and thoughts. I have never read better poetry ever before. Congratulations, you take the Cake.
Sincerely,
Tamara0449
Tamara Lesley
Thank you for Voting for my poetry. I wanted to return the favor for you. I read 'Secret Garden' first and was blown away by it. I loved how you added the beautiful pictures and they and the words took me to your secret garden in my mind. I could see it in all of it's glory. I loved all of your poetry, you should be or are already published somewhere. A writer as good as you should be published to share the beauty of your words and thoughts. I have never read better poetry ever before. Congratulations, you take the Cake.
Sincerely,
Tamara0449
Tamara Lesley
This Feedback was...
8/19/2009 3:06 PM PDT
These poems were lovely. The first poem- Three Years, literaaly brought me to tears. I loved the pictures, they add so much to the verse and the moment. Thank you!
This Feedback was...
8/19/2009 9:05 AM PDT
Your words flow and bring peace to the heart!! you have my vote for sure!
This Feedback was...
8/19/2009 9:03 AM PDT
What perfectly penned pieces of poetry you have yourself here. I truly enjoyed all of them. The photos, I find, complimented the poetry, but you really did not need them to make the poems stand out. :o) Well done. Keep up with the great work. Keep on penning. Thank you so very much for sharing your wonderful and creative talents with us.
*S* Cynthia
P.S.
I vote yes.
*S* Cynthia
P.S.
I vote yes.
This Feedback was...
8/19/2009 1:12 AM PDT
I love them all.
my fave was the 2nd one. PUBLISH PUBLISH PUBLISH
my fave was the 2nd one. PUBLISH PUBLISH PUBLISH
This Feedback was...
8/17/2009 12:53 PM PDT
I loved reading your poetry.
Your words flow easly and are well put together.
You got my vote.
Good Luck.
http://www.webook.com/project/Blackened-Rose
Your words flow easly and are well put together.
You got my vote.
Good Luck.
http://www.webook.com/project/Blackened-Rose
This Feedback was...
8/17/2009 11:28 AM PDT
Very good poems and thanks for your vote
This Feedback was...
8/16/2009 12:18 PM PDT
You write very well, and with a seeming ease that belies the work put into your writing. I voted to publish.
This Feedback was...
8/15/2009 10:15 PM PDT
This Feedback was...
8/15/2009 3:29 PM PDT
Three great poems. A yes vote from me.
This Feedback was...
8/15/2009 1:33 PM PDT
absolutly love the 1st poem it was veary beautifyl
This Feedback was...
8/15/2009 1:13 PM PDT
Beautiful! the pictures had a nice effect! got my vote!
This Feedback was...
8/15/2009 7:41 AM PDT
I love it how you included pictures to the poems, it just adds a special effect to it I guess...
I love the poems as well!!
I love the poems as well!!
This Feedback was...
8/14/2009 7:54 PM PDT
All three poems were amazing! Publish!
This Feedback was...
8/14/2009 3:57 PM PDT
I liked these very much, especially with the photos. Not that the poems needed any help - the imagery was brilliant.
You have my vote!
You have my vote!
This Feedback was...
8/13/2009 2:50 PM PDT
three years is my shit
the best poem of the vote
so far P U B L I S H
the best poem of the vote
so far P U B L I S H
This Feedback was...
8/13/2009 1:56 PM PDT
I really liked secret garden. And Three years was both heart felt and rateable for me. good job.
This Feedback was...
8/13/2009 1:36 PM PDT
Absolutely beautiful poetry and pictures. Of course I voted "Yes"! You have a wonderful talent for creastive writing and the visual was an added gift. Good luck in the contest.
This Feedback was...
8/13/2009 12:37 PM PDT
Very nocturne like and hauntingly ethereal.
Moonbeams and dreams.
Quality aknowledged.
Moonbeams and dreams.
Quality aknowledged.
This Feedback was...
8/13/2009 11:49 AM PDT
Thank you for taking the time to read my work and leave feedback. I enjoyed all three but could ffeel the compassion in secret garden. Isn't it funny how different poems apeal to different people for special reasons that the poet doens't even know what is going on?
I voted and you have a yes from me.
I voted and you have a yes from me.
This Feedback was...
8/13/2009 11:17 AM PDT
loved all 3,publish
This Feedback was...
8/13/2009 7:45 AM PDT
These were so beautiful, my favorite was Three Years but they were all wonderfully writting. You got a yes from me :D
This Feedback was...
8/12/2009 2:52 PM PDT
I love how you added the pictures, it gave a real "face" to the imagery ...nicely done! Good Luck!
This Feedback was...
8/12/2009 11:54 AM PDT
omg... this was so touching i felt a tug in my heart...beautiful..yes for a vote...i like this alot!!
This Feedback was...
8/12/2009 11:26 AM PDT
Nice work. I like the simplicity of the language used, the rhyming pattern, and the strict rhythmic pattern. It shows you really took your time to express these great images in the form of poetry, and I think of the three the Secret Garden is the best. Not only does it place the reader in a wonderful scene, but it makes it whimsical, so peaceful. The final stanza is great and leaves one with a smile. I usually lean for the more dramatic and tragic poetry, but your work here is very refreshing and I like it. I say yes to publishing based mainly on the Secret Garden, where you really pulled all the elements together to make a really good piece.
This Feedback was...
8/11/2009 7:52 PM PDT
Different genre than what I am used to with the pictures. I like the middle one without pictures the best. This allows me to use my imagination to conjure up the images your poetry allows. I did vote yes but think about what I have posted. Good luck.
This Feedback was...
8/11/2009 12:46 PM PDT
very good. Publish
This Feedback was...
8/11/2009 10:20 AM PDT
This Feedback was...
8/10/2009 6:33 PM PDT
Beautiful! Got a Yes from me.
This Feedback was...
8/10/2009 4:22 PM PDT
Wonderful love poems and the last, my favorite, a nature lover's delight. What wonderful photographs. I hope these get published.
This Feedback was...
8/10/2009 10:30 AM PDT
Very well written, and I enjoyed reading your poetry very much. I agree with the others in that you have written poems that show emotions and the type of poetry that many have long forgotten. Great job! I wish you the best of luck in the contest!
This Feedback was...
8/10/2009 6:00 AM PDT
Oozing emotions, great stuff, good olde fashioned poetry at it's finest.
Best of luck, you have my vote :)
Best of luck, you have my vote :)
This Feedback was...
8/9/2009 10:08 PM PDT
These are quite lovely, very well written, pretty, blissful poems. and by the way, thank you for voting on mine, it was so kind of you. May your day be blessed in many ways.
This Feedback was...
8/9/2009 2:33 PM PDT
Thou Shalt Keep It Simple, Stupid.--Richard Marcinko, Commandments of Battles
I, of course, am calling your work something much better than stupid, sir. It's just that, too often, people forget how poetry used to work back in the day, nice simple structure that convey emotions and imagery. What it lacks in excitement and angst, it makes up for elegance. There are days I really wonder if the old form of poetry is going to survive this century. Therefore, in addition to being righteous poems of the old school that deserve to be seen by a wider audience, I am voting YES to convey my support for the continuation of this tradition that you so marvelously embody.
I, of course, am calling your work something much better than stupid, sir. It's just that, too often, people forget how poetry used to work back in the day, nice simple structure that convey emotions and imagery. What it lacks in excitement and angst, it makes up for elegance. There are days I really wonder if the old form of poetry is going to survive this century. Therefore, in addition to being righteous poems of the old school that deserve to be seen by a wider audience, I am voting YES to convey my support for the continuation of this tradition that you so marvelously embody.
This Feedback was...
8/9/2009 1:13 PM PDT
It's some very beautiful work...sad u won't be able to get the pictures in if these poems are published....'Three Years' has my absolute vote as its longing passion is sublime, and the use of the words 'three years' again and again is what keeps me reading.
This Feedback was...
8/9/2009 6:49 AM PDT
General:
Beautiful. I loved the way each poem tells a story and draws you into the world you've imagined. You definitely have my vote.
Form:
The form was consistent throughout each verse which I think helps them flow more.
Content:
The stories each poem tells are simple but beautiful and compelling without being overly complex.
Imagery:
The imagery is beautiful. Tennyson was described as a 'painterly poet' and I think you may have that in common with him - it was impossible not to see the pictures you painted.
Beautiful. I loved the way each poem tells a story and draws you into the world you've imagined. You definitely have my vote.
Form:
The form was consistent throughout each verse which I think helps them flow more.
Content:
The stories each poem tells are simple but beautiful and compelling without being overly complex.
Imagery:
The imagery is beautiful. Tennyson was described as a 'painterly poet' and I think you may have that in common with him - it was impossible not to see the pictures you painted.
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 7:36 PM PDT
you have depth and talent. this is an awesome collection.
i vote publish.
i vote publish.
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 7:10 PM PDT
i also like the pictures very different.
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 7:09 PM PDT
Got my Vote!!!
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 5:49 PM PDT
Excellent pieces, you have my vote.
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 3:53 PM PDT
I loved them and I loved the pictures
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 12:59 PM PDT
simple but elegant....very nice
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 11:41 AM PDT
I really enjoyed the simplistic yet beautiful imagery that you projected into my imagination with your words. I vote yes. Thank you!
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 11:41 AM PDT
yes, very good.
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 11:00 AM PDT
Wow, I really enjoyed the comparison of the pictures and the repetition of the poems for emphasis!
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 8:58 AM PDT
Very creative, realistic pieces! You said it was different than my style. I think that is what makes poetry so exciting. Everyone can be different and still come together.
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 8:34 AM PDT
Great work! I didn't know we could use pictures. No fair. Kiddin' LOL. Good Luck! Cheers!
This Feedback was...
8/8/2009 7:46 AM PDT
These were a great read. I have to say my favorite was 3 years. Yes vote by me my friend.
This Feedback was...
8/7/2009 3:27 PM PDT
i voted
This Feedback was...
8/7/2009 3:15 PM PDT
Mixing media is kind of fun -- you've done it well. Nice writing.
This Feedback was...
8/7/2009 1:08 PM PDT
This Feedback was...
8/7/2009 1:04 PM PDT
He should have learned to write. I like the sentiment and the longing/waiting aspects
This Feedback was...
8/7/2009 12:51 PM PDT
This is some of the best stuff I've read, and you have my vote; good luck.
This Feedback was...
8/7/2009 10:35 AM PDT
Has potential, so a yes vote from me...
http://www.webook.com/project/Top-3-Poems-of-Assorted-Interest
http://www.webook.com/project/Top-3-Poems-of-Assorted-Interest
This Feedback was...
8/7/2009 7:59 AM PDT
Great writes,voted yes,hope all goes well.
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 9:43 PM PDT
Content:
Ah, this was great! I really got a sense of the story, and her emotions not through the words, but also through the pictures.. This is great read!
Ah, this was great! I really got a sense of the story, and her emotions not through the words, but also through the pictures.. This is great read!
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 5:02 PM PDT
Very well written. You have mastered the art of setting a scene, even without the images. You have my vote.
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 3:29 PM PDT
AMAZING POEMS! GREAT JOB!
I VOTED YES!
~KAte
I VOTED YES!
~KAte
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 3:21 PM PDT
I was very happy to vote these publish my favourite being, the secret garden.
Good Luck.
http://www.webook.com/project/Three-for-the-competition
If ou have the time.
Good Luck.
http://www.webook.com/project/Three-for-the-competition
If ou have the time.
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 2:14 PM PDT
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 2:04 PM PDT
I like how you added the images in. I think they bring out the perfect affect of your work. My vote is in. Thank you for veiwing my project.
~Half Pint
~Half Pint
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 12:10 PM PDT
Very rhythmic poems :) got my vote! :)
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 10:12 AM PDT
My fave is "Secret Garden" I must say I enjoy your efforts to rhym. I know that seems abit passe in most of what I read. But it is good to see that ryhming is not dead. LOL
You have my vote. Have look at mine if you have the time
You have my vote. Have look at mine if you have the time
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 9:10 AM PDT
Your presentation using images along with imagery is extraordinaire. Your style has an easy and comfortable flow and your content is delightful and easy to read. Two Thumbs Up! BDC
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 8:41 AM PDT
good use of illustration with your poem; overall good feeling while reading, enjoyed it a lot
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 7:48 AM PDT
General:
Enjoyed all three.
Form:
Add apostrophes to your possessives:
Night's reality
Night's shroud
Nature's care
Content:
Enjoyed your choice of subject matter in all three poems.
Musicality:
Nice flow in each.
Good Luck.
Enjoyed all three.
Form:
Add apostrophes to your possessives:
Night's reality
Night's shroud
Nature's care
Content:
Enjoyed your choice of subject matter in all three poems.
Musicality:
Nice flow in each.
Good Luck.
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 6:43 AM PDT
quite lovely. you have my vote!
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 4:46 AM PDT
Beautiful, definitely publish I say, thumbs up and best of luck
This Feedback was...
8/6/2009 2:58 AM PDT
Very polished and I loved the use of photographs. I found myself meandering through the garden, my perfect type of garden, I might add. Top work publish, and good luck
Howard
Howard
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 11:17 PM PDT
nice
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 9:57 PM PDT
I liked your words and the imagery they possessed, but I did find the poems with the pictures less gratifying than Nights Reality.
I thought Secret Garden was the most well thought out poem I've read on WEbook, but for me the pictures took away from the beautiful confusion and purpose inside the imagery that you created. Though the pictures were nice, they took away from the natural mystery inside my mind of the "growing paradise" that you were describing. Also, when reading this I tried to read it like a poem that rhymed, but at times it does not which made it hard to read at first. The second time through I read it without stopping and it was majestic.
I thought Secret Garden was the most well thought out poem I've read on WEbook, but for me the pictures took away from the beautiful confusion and purpose inside the imagery that you created. Though the pictures were nice, they took away from the natural mystery inside my mind of the "growing paradise" that you were describing. Also, when reading this I tried to read it like a poem that rhymed, but at times it does not which made it hard to read at first. The second time through I read it without stopping and it was majestic.
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 7:31 PM PDT
General:
Among the three Night's Reality stood out the most.
Imagery:
Spot on, visually perceptive.
Among the three Night's Reality stood out the most.
Imagery:
Spot on, visually perceptive.
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 3:05 PM PDT
From my experience, trying to read and develop the image within the words of your works becomes confusing with the pictures between the verses. Maybe its just me.
Beyond that, I found your pieces unique within their own right. good luck to you.
Beyond that, I found your pieces unique within their own right. good luck to you.
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 1:22 PM PDT
General:
I have no hesitation in voting for these poems to be published.
Form:
Nicely structured and have always been a champion of words and pictures together.
Content:
Interesting content kept my interest from beginning to end and cleverly crafted.
Imagery:
Faultless imagery easy to see the writers intentions and empathise with his feelings.
Tone:
Casual easy flow and pleasing rhythm throughout.
I have no hesitation in voting for these poems to be published.
Form:
Nicely structured and have always been a champion of words and pictures together.
Content:
Interesting content kept my interest from beginning to end and cleverly crafted.
Imagery:
Faultless imagery easy to see the writers intentions and empathise with his feelings.
Tone:
Casual easy flow and pleasing rhythm throughout.
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 12:06 PM PDT
Mark - thanks for checking out my submission, thought I'd repay the favor and am glad I did.
I'm a picky one when it comes to the voting process of webook and "publish" votes, but there is no hesitation from me for your submissions.
Not once while reading any of them, was the flow of words in my head broken off, like has been the case with many of the other poems I've read, which I'm a big stickler about. Poetry/prose is meant to flow smoothly, and yours is perfect in this regard in my opinion.
the meter here is very musical, and the rhyming schemes etc... all made them fun to read.
Good Luck!
I'm a picky one when it comes to the voting process of webook and "publish" votes, but there is no hesitation from me for your submissions.
Not once while reading any of them, was the flow of words in my head broken off, like has been the case with many of the other poems I've read, which I'm a big stickler about. Poetry/prose is meant to flow smoothly, and yours is perfect in this regard in my opinion.
the meter here is very musical, and the rhyming schemes etc... all made them fun to read.
Good Luck!
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 12:05 PM PDT
publish:D
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 12:04 PM PDT
nice writting, I really liked the pictures you included, it gave depth to the work, nicely done, I voted yes
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 11:56 AM PDT
nice detail!
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 7:01 AM PDT
Great work. Shah, X
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 6:20 AM PDT
a Yes vote here!
great writing.
If you want to find mine:
http://www.webook.com/project/Voodoo-Hearts-My-3-Poems-for-entry-Webook-2009poetryVOTE
thank you, good luck too!
great writing.
If you want to find mine:
http://www.webook.com/project/Voodoo-Hearts-My-3-Poems-for-entry-Webook-2009poetryVOTE
thank you, good luck too!
This Feedback was...
8/5/2009 5:08 AM PDT
General:
The general format is well set out, well thought out .
Form:
intersting read
Content:
excellent
Imagery:
pictures in pic form and good visual form in the mind .
Tone:
it flows
Musicality:
Any poeem has to sing this is soothing to the ear
The general format is well set out, well thought out .
Form:
intersting read
Content:
excellent
Imagery:
pictures in pic form and good visual form in the mind .
Tone:
it flows
Musicality:
Any poeem has to sing this is soothing to the ear
This Feedback was...
8/4/2009 11:08 PM PDT
Hey, great stuff on all three pieces. I am impressed as I have perused alot of the projects in contention at random, and this is one of the first of dozens that I would deem worthy to TRULY be published and see on a bookshelf.
Now, for the otherhand; 1- Your last piece 'Secret Garden' basically lacks an ending to it, depriving it of deeper meaning.
2- Get rid of ALL pictures embedded in your work. This almost ruins the quality of your writing. Your imagery in your words is supposed to paint the picture for us, ESPECIALLY, above all else, in poetry ... Not someone's high-megapixel, Kodak digital camera. (Even if you did take them yourself.)
Hope this feedback is helpful and constructive.
kp
Now, for the otherhand; 1- Your last piece 'Secret Garden' basically lacks an ending to it, depriving it of deeper meaning.
2- Get rid of ALL pictures embedded in your work. This almost ruins the quality of your writing. Your imagery in your words is supposed to paint the picture for us, ESPECIALLY, above all else, in poetry ... Not someone's high-megapixel, Kodak digital camera. (Even if you did take them yourself.)
Hope this feedback is helpful and constructive.
kp
This Feedback was...
8/4/2009 5:43 PM PDT
Love it all! Publish.
This Feedback was...
8/4/2009 4:42 PM PDT
Very nice work, glad I had the op to read them! Voted.
This Feedback was...
8/4/2009 4:40 PM PDT
I absolutly love your poems!
This Feedback was...
8/4/2009 3:22 PM PDT
i find the pictures distracting but other than that, nice writing!!
This Feedback was...
8/4/2009 3:10 PM PDT
General:
vote submitted...
Content:
great opener...
" Nights hooded shroud welcomes me now "
Imagery:
lucid..
vote submitted...
Content:
great opener...
" Nights hooded shroud welcomes me now "
Imagery:
lucid..
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8/4/2009 3:04 PM PDT
good poetry with good imagery I vote to publish
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8/4/2009 1:37 PM PDT
Three Years is my favorite. A blend of various emotions. Very good.
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8/4/2009 11:31 AM PDT
I agree with your summary...
I too, would write even if no one read my work.
still its nice to be appreciated.
you have my vote
our writing has great insight
I too, would write even if no one read my work.
still its nice to be appreciated.
you have my vote
our writing has great insight
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8/4/2009 11:30 AM PDT
vote
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8/4/2009 10:55 AM PDT
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8/4/2009 10:55 AM PDT
The first poem was very lovely; it put me in mind of perhaps the 15th ... 16th century; the age of long sea voyages and seperated lovers. Number two was beautifully composed and romantic, I'm always a sucker for a secret garden, and I thought that was a nice outside of the box subject matter. All three 'leaf' you feeling pleasant. I enjoyed them.
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8/4/2009 10:47 AM PDT
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8/4/2009 10:47 AM PDT
Strong imagery. I wonder if the pictures you posted will be printed with your poems.It would be very interesting that way.You have my vote.
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8/3/2009 4:59 PM PDT
Like a polished jewel. Nothing to change. Loved it!
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8/2/2009 3:20 PM PDT
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8/2/2009 7:58 AM PDT
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8/1/2009 4:21 PM PDT
All of these pieces are a cut above anything else I've see in this genre and I belive it is a no brainer to publish them
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8/1/2009 9:03 AM PDT
Great work
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