Book Info
-
Project Leader:
anitalite
-
Participants:
The WEbook community -
Who Can Write:
All Participants -
Category:
Non-Fiction -
Genre:
Humor
Reference -
Language:
English
book_central
That's Dumb! (or How To Be Dumb)
Note: If you have never done anything dumb or have never been witness to anything done dumbly by someone else, then, well, your feedback would be just as valuable to the project as a submission would be.
Let's have some fun and think of the dumbest moments of our lives, or someone else's lives. LOL. I only ask that you keep it clean (this is a family project, thank you) and will say I'll have to remove submissions that use foul language or are sexually explicit. I may ask you just to ch ... more »
Let's have some fun and think of the dumbest moments of our lives, or someone else's lives. LOL. I only ask that you keep it clean (this is a family project, thank you) and will say I'll have to remove submissions that use foul language or are sexually explicit. I may ask you just to ch ... more »
GIVE FEEDBACK
Ever watched "America's Dumbest Criminals' ?
there was one episode where a guy broke into a place through the roof and ended up falling through and landed straddling a wall his balls swelled up to the size of grape nuts. His arms were stuck up in the area he'd fallen through too, so there was no way for him to prevent himself from being wracked painfully by the wall beam.
Or How about the one where a dude broke in through the ventilation of a restaurant and ended up burning his feet on the grill every time he tried to put his feet down, and he continued trying to put his feet down.
OR there was on time when my brother was around 5 he was running around outside naked and teasing the chickens. They nearly bit his wee wee thinking it was a worm... needless to say he stopped running around naked after that.
There are three for you XD
P.S. You should totally watch America's Dumbest Criminals, it's hilarious!
there was one episode where a guy broke into a place through the roof and ended up falling through and landed straddling a wall his balls swelled up to the size of grape nuts. His arms were stuck up in the area he'd fallen through too, so there was no way for him to prevent himself from being wracked painfully by the wall beam.
Or How about the one where a dude broke in through the ventilation of a restaurant and ended up burning his feet on the grill every time he tried to put his feet down, and he continued trying to put his feet down.
OR there was on time when my brother was around 5 he was running around outside naked and teasing the chickens. They nearly bit his wee wee thinking it was a worm... needless to say he stopped running around naked after that.
There are three for you XD
P.S. You should totally watch America's Dumbest Criminals, it's hilarious!
I kant thing off anyfing dumb I ever done, butt maybe I just aint dumb is that eat?
Well, where to start?
How's about the time I went swimming, got changed, went through the foot-bath, jumped into the pool - then discovered I'd left my SOCKS on!?
Or 'tailgating' a co-worker (we were both on push-bikes, going down a good, steep hill on our way home from one of those government training schemes) so much, I ended up the other side of the road?
Or, a few weeks ago, pouring gravy into my coffee instead of milk!!!???!??!
Lee, 44
How's about the time I went swimming, got changed, went through the foot-bath, jumped into the pool - then discovered I'd left my SOCKS on!?
Or 'tailgating' a co-worker (we were both on push-bikes, going down a good, steep hill on our way home from one of those government training schemes) so much, I ended up the other side of the road?
Or, a few weeks ago, pouring gravy into my coffee instead of milk!!!???!??!
Lee, 44
I have three dumb stories, one from my sister and two from myself. Neither have anything to do with what we did, but instead what we saw.
The dumbest thing my sister has ever seen was a tow truck towing another tow truck.
One of the dumbest things I have ever seen was on my college campus. One of the small john deere trackers the university uses had been pulled over by the university police for...wait for it...speeding.
And lastly, one of the dumbest things I heard was right before the 2008 presidential election. Two girls were walking down the sidewalk on campus and had just passed the college democrats booth. One girl says to the other, "I guess they're all registering to vote." And the second girl looks at her and says, "Vote for what?"
The dumbest thing my sister has ever seen was a tow truck towing another tow truck.
One of the dumbest things I have ever seen was on my college campus. One of the small john deere trackers the university uses had been pulled over by the university police for...wait for it...speeding.
And lastly, one of the dumbest things I heard was right before the 2008 presidential election. Two girls were walking down the sidewalk on campus and had just passed the college democrats booth. One girl says to the other, "I guess they're all registering to vote." And the second girl looks at her and says, "Vote for what?"
Tone/Voice:
My parents have always told me if you are good at something you should stick with it. I have inadvertantly applied that to myself in the form of dumb luck and clumsiness.
One particularly day stands out. My family refers to it as a typical Becca Moment. I was 12 years old sitting in the back of a very packed church. My family is Greek Orthodox and Easter sevice begins at 1200 in the morning. This particular service can last upwards of 2 or more hours. It is a beautiful service with lavish decorations.
The service seemed to tweek all of my senses. The sight and smells of hundreds if not thousands of flowers arranged carefully and lovingly throughout the church. The intense smell of ancient fragrances from the incense in the ornate brass instrument used by the preist as he blesses the congregation. The comfort of being in church surrounded by friends and family. The soft calming effect of the candle light from individual candels held by each parishoner. I can still remember the peaceful feeling that came over me.
The next thing I knew I felt hot. Really really hot. I realized I had fallen asleep. Then out of no where the man sitting next to me began to hit me in the chest. Not hard enough to hurt but rather shocking non the less. Everything seemed to be in slow motion as I looked around. The preist and EVERYONE in the church had fallen silent. There was no movement except for this really annoying guy next to me hitting me and my mother on the other side yelling my name.
Then DING DING DING clarity stuck me...... I had become so comfortable I had fallen asleep holding my candle. I had caught on fire in church! The man had been trying to put the fire out that had engulfed the entire front of my brand new Easter dress, exposing my training bra to everyone including God. My mother had been yelling at me to wake up. And as for the other parishoners I believe they were just stunned.
To this day my family and friend continue to joke about my " dumb luck".
My parents have always told me if you are good at something you should stick with it. I have inadvertantly applied that to myself in the form of dumb luck and clumsiness.
One particularly day stands out. My family refers to it as a typical Becca Moment. I was 12 years old sitting in the back of a very packed church. My family is Greek Orthodox and Easter sevice begins at 1200 in the morning. This particular service can last upwards of 2 or more hours. It is a beautiful service with lavish decorations.
The service seemed to tweek all of my senses. The sight and smells of hundreds if not thousands of flowers arranged carefully and lovingly throughout the church. The intense smell of ancient fragrances from the incense in the ornate brass instrument used by the preist as he blesses the congregation. The comfort of being in church surrounded by friends and family. The soft calming effect of the candle light from individual candels held by each parishoner. I can still remember the peaceful feeling that came over me.
The next thing I knew I felt hot. Really really hot. I realized I had fallen asleep. Then out of no where the man sitting next to me began to hit me in the chest. Not hard enough to hurt but rather shocking non the less. Everything seemed to be in slow motion as I looked around. The preist and EVERYONE in the church had fallen silent. There was no movement except for this really annoying guy next to me hitting me and my mother on the other side yelling my name.
Then DING DING DING clarity stuck me...... I had become so comfortable I had fallen asleep holding my candle. I had caught on fire in church! The man had been trying to put the fire out that had engulfed the entire front of my brand new Easter dress, exposing my training bra to everyone including God. My mother had been yelling at me to wake up. And as for the other parishoners I believe they were just stunned.
To this day my family and friend continue to joke about my " dumb luck".
Interesting idea, as well as entertaining. I think I can scare up a story or two.
Well, while I was suffering with swollen feet, I developed a habit of always wearing bedroom slippers when at home.
One morning after driving to work, only when climbing out of the car, did I notice my battered and tattered slippers... still firmly on my feet!
There was nothing I could do but casually stroll up the steps, breeze through the doors and along the corridors, head high and face red, studiously ignoring the surprised stares, sniggers and giggles of almost every person I passed. Throughout that long and torturous walk, ¨dumb¨ does not come close to describing how I felt.
Somehow, I survived the day with a small crumb of dignity intact, destroyed later, however, by that month´s workplace newsletter with a cartoon ridiculing my embarrassing predicament, right on the front page!
One morning after driving to work, only when climbing out of the car, did I notice my battered and tattered slippers... still firmly on my feet!
There was nothing I could do but casually stroll up the steps, breeze through the doors and along the corridors, head high and face red, studiously ignoring the surprised stares, sniggers and giggles of almost every person I passed. Throughout that long and torturous walk, ¨dumb¨ does not come close to describing how I felt.
Somehow, I survived the day with a small crumb of dignity intact, destroyed later, however, by that month´s workplace newsletter with a cartoon ridiculing my embarrassing predicament, right on the front page!
My Dad's best dumb moment was when he wanted to send me a web page so he printed it off and faxed it to me!
One of my best blond moments was when I was singing along to the radio in the car. There I was singing away to Money for nothing by Dire Straits “money for nothing and I’m six foot three” I sang out. My girlfriend started laugh hysterically and took quite a few moments to choke out that the lyrics are really “money for nothing and your chicks for free” –“ahhrr” I said slightly red faced “I always through those lyrics were strange.“
And just to compound my music illiteracy one of my other friends was talking about the Pussy Cat Dolls and I said “Tracy, you know I don’t have children how am I supposed to know what the latest Barbie is” She then had to explain that it was a girl group. I am sooooo uncool!
And just to compound my music illiteracy one of my other friends was talking about the Pussy Cat Dolls and I said “Tracy, you know I don’t have children how am I supposed to know what the latest Barbie is” She then had to explain that it was a girl group. I am sooooo uncool!
meh dumbest thing ive done was prank call my teacher (smartest i was underaged so i couldnt get charged ) then got caught, and could have lied my way out cause she ahd no proof and even dumber lied, then told the truth???!!!
The dumbest thing I've ever done is drink alone and then join this group and make this post
I've done heaps of dumbthings, but two crack-ups where in 1). in 2006, year 10, when I was 'caught' staring at a stupid boy that really liked me, when I was in actual fact staring in space cause the p.e. lesson (about dumb-bells and their prospective weights and stuff- boring!!) was so boring, and 2). was last night, when I said a really stupid thing in front of my family and my dad's friend, who was staying with us for a few days. xD
the dumbest thing i ever did was because of love. I fell in love with my math tutor and i wanted him to know that i liked him. i am very shy though and could not bring myself to tell him. i had another tutor as a friend on my myspace and i had recently written a song about my crush and posted it as a blog of course leaving out his name. anyway i had this bright idea to send a email out telling people to read my blog about this guy that i have a crush on (i use crush cause i don't want to freak the guy out with the word love). i sent it to my spanish tutor hoping he could not keep a secert. I sent one to my other friend Jessica who works in the tutoring center just so he would think i sent it to all my friends cause i did not want him to think i was talking about him. despite all my reasoning things went a rye. when i checked my myspace later i noticed he wasn't on my friends list any more. i found out later that his girl friend ran his site and thought i was talking about him. it all worked out though Jessica explained that i wasn't talking about him and he later apologized to me for his girl friends behavior. I am so embarred now cause I know from this whole experience this was a DUMB thing to do. but hay you'll do anything for love.
As a young man, I prided myself on certain skills that allowed me to see movies in the Cinema on a regular basis, even though I was indeed broke as a joke.
On one occasion I found myself handing the shaky teen behind the popcorn counter my Math quiz, which was clearly exactly that, a Math quiz, and I said it was a coupon for a large Coke - the Large size being the only size they refill for free (I was thinking about my friends, too!) The clerk looked it over for a moment and was clearly confused - I don't know if he couldn't read or if he was just scrambled by my obvious and poorly masked attempt at a free soda, so he showed it to his "adult" supervisor. This supervisor, in his own twisting world of service, looked at it for one second and became sour. "What are you showing me?" He asked and told the clerk to get out of his face. At this point, the clerk turned back around and, looking at the line growing behind me, proceeded to fill a large cup with Coke and slide it across the counter to me. "Thanks, man!" I said and got myself a straw. Upon sticking it through the cover and taking a sip, I reached back over the counter and snatched my Math quiz away from his hand. "I'll need that back, pal." I said and went off to my movie. I almost stopped to ask him for a few more cups for my group of friends who were waiting, but figured that might have been too far.
If you like this one, I have a few more.
-Pat
On one occasion I found myself handing the shaky teen behind the popcorn counter my Math quiz, which was clearly exactly that, a Math quiz, and I said it was a coupon for a large Coke - the Large size being the only size they refill for free (I was thinking about my friends, too!) The clerk looked it over for a moment and was clearly confused - I don't know if he couldn't read or if he was just scrambled by my obvious and poorly masked attempt at a free soda, so he showed it to his "adult" supervisor. This supervisor, in his own twisting world of service, looked at it for one second and became sour. "What are you showing me?" He asked and told the clerk to get out of his face. At this point, the clerk turned back around and, looking at the line growing behind me, proceeded to fill a large cup with Coke and slide it across the counter to me. "Thanks, man!" I said and got myself a straw. Upon sticking it through the cover and taking a sip, I reached back over the counter and snatched my Math quiz away from his hand. "I'll need that back, pal." I said and went off to my movie. I almost stopped to ask him for a few more cups for my group of friends who were waiting, but figured that might have been too far.
If you like this one, I have a few more.
-Pat
Thanks for the invite to this Project, although the countless idiotic bouts I've reined supreme at, non are ready for review, yet. Until then, I will pleasure in reading, and reviewing other, submission's.
Once Again, Thank You.
Once Again, Thank You.
This is a pretty hilarious topic. There is no better way to get over life's dumb moments than to look back on them after we are no longer blushing and laugh at ourselves. And, if we aren't good at laughing at ourselves, this project allows us to laugh at others...and who doesn't love that? I hope I can contribute to this soon. Great idea!
How do I make this project stop sending me updates? Please stop. I'm not interested!
Thanks for the invite, I joined too - very new here, so I hope to learn how this works. As for dumb, I think it is my middle name! Please let me know how to add to this project. Thanks!
Please note: If you leave feedback for someone less than five stars please tell the author what they can do to improve their story to make it a five. I don't think it does any good to leave stars less than five if you're not going to suggest improvements anymore than I think it's okay to leave five stars when there can be improvements. Okie doke?
Thank you from your Dumb project leader,
anitalite ;-)_
Thank you from your Dumb project leader,
anitalite ;-)_
Oh yeah I have did dumb things and there were my own doing.
This Feedback was...
Dumb is me with a capital D. I have seen and done many a dumb thing in my life, some have even lead to broken bones for me.
This Feedback was...
Thanks for the invite, I've done a lot of dumb things in my 67 years, but I'm not sure anyone would be interested, as to the dumbest? Well, that might be a matter of opinion. Don't get much time to visit on the internet, so I'll have to pass right now.
This Feedback was...
thanks thanks for invite.... i could add to this... i hope
This Feedback was...
thank you for the invite
dumb thing to me was being born blonde
as you know subject to many jokes
and people dont think you have a brain
so lets hope
dumb thing to me was being born blonde
as you know subject to many jokes
and people dont think you have a brain
so lets hope
This Feedback was...
Let's see the dumbest thing I ever saw, was one time I was walking up to School one day (and I was walking against traffic) and I have to go up this giant hill and on the way up I saw this lady driving down the hill, putting on her make-up, talking on her cell, having a smoke, listening to her music that was crazy by the way and. Drinking a coffee on the way down and trying to drive too. Now I thought to myself, either that's the dumbest thing do to, or the most skill I have ever seen.
This Feedback was...
The message below was written in response to a message from the Project Leader regarding the distribution of royalties, and I thought it might help others:
Hi,
Thanks for your message, I certainly have some views about the distribution of royalties but it does seem a bit premature to air any views before the book is definitely going to be published. I am also concerned that any airing of views at this stage might prejudice the inclusion or exclusion of any contributions from any book that might be published.
When the book is to be definitely published then I would be happy to discuss or negotiate the division of royalties, and to this end it might be helpful for you to consider a number of points:
1) The payment of royalties carries a symbolism that goes beyond mere finance. When an Author, or any other Artist, receives payment for their work then there is a motivating sense of having done something worthwhile, and receiving ongoing royalties for work is an ongoing source of motivation (not to mention helping to keep the wolf from the door).
2) Royalties are not one-off payments, they are on-going for the number of years set out in the Copyright Law of either the country in which the book, or other art form, is to be published, or the Copyright Law of another country by agreed contract. In the UK I own my music compositions for the entirety of my natural life PLUS seventy years, and my copyright ownership is transferable to my heirs and successors. Correct me if I'm wrong but I seem to recall that copyright in the US only lasts for fifty years - but even fifty years worth of royalties might be worth having.
3) Don't underestimated the amount of royalties. If the book does well then there could be some very large sums of money involved and dividing those sums amongst the 100+ Authors could still constitute a reasonable income. A well-publicised paradigm could be J K Rowling, who is now worth a fortune just on her royalties alone.
I hope that this helps.
Take Care
Peter (Jazspeak)
Hi,
Thanks for your message, I certainly have some views about the distribution of royalties but it does seem a bit premature to air any views before the book is definitely going to be published. I am also concerned that any airing of views at this stage might prejudice the inclusion or exclusion of any contributions from any book that might be published.
When the book is to be definitely published then I would be happy to discuss or negotiate the division of royalties, and to this end it might be helpful for you to consider a number of points:
1) The payment of royalties carries a symbolism that goes beyond mere finance. When an Author, or any other Artist, receives payment for their work then there is a motivating sense of having done something worthwhile, and receiving ongoing royalties for work is an ongoing source of motivation (not to mention helping to keep the wolf from the door).
2) Royalties are not one-off payments, they are on-going for the number of years set out in the Copyright Law of either the country in which the book, or other art form, is to be published, or the Copyright Law of another country by agreed contract. In the UK I own my music compositions for the entirety of my natural life PLUS seventy years, and my copyright ownership is transferable to my heirs and successors. Correct me if I'm wrong but I seem to recall that copyright in the US only lasts for fifty years - but even fifty years worth of royalties might be worth having.
3) Don't underestimated the amount of royalties. If the book does well then there could be some very large sums of money involved and dividing those sums amongst the 100+ Authors could still constitute a reasonable income. A well-publicised paradigm could be J K Rowling, who is now worth a fortune just on her royalties alone.
I hope that this helps.
Take Care
Peter (Jazspeak)
This Feedback was...
Dumb huh? My father is the king of dumb! You are allowed to use this instance if you want, just let me know if you are going to use it.
When I was little, we used to live on a small hobby farm. When I was about seven we were making a pole barn. Of course my lazy ass dad didn't put much effort in so me and my mom and my sister did most of the work. (Typical man, right?)
He got pinned with the job of replaced the screws in the metal sheeting on the roof of the barn with the right ones. (Cause he bought the wrong ones and put them in)
My father, starts pulling the screws out of the roof, but he plans to take all the screws out of the metal sheet he is sitting on and then replace them with the right ones. (FYI the roof is at an angle) As you can well guess, the metal sheet starts to slip. He starts screaming for help. Hanging on the side of the barn.
My mom walks by a window and see this. What she does is call us over to watch. (She figured out what the dumb bell did) We watch for about twenty minutes before she decides to go out and help. By the time she does this, he saved himself.
End of the story. Hope it helps. ^^
-Senko
When I was little, we used to live on a small hobby farm. When I was about seven we were making a pole barn. Of course my lazy ass dad didn't put much effort in so me and my mom and my sister did most of the work. (Typical man, right?)
He got pinned with the job of replaced the screws in the metal sheeting on the roof of the barn with the right ones. (Cause he bought the wrong ones and put them in)
My father, starts pulling the screws out of the roof, but he plans to take all the screws out of the metal sheet he is sitting on and then replace them with the right ones. (FYI the roof is at an angle) As you can well guess, the metal sheet starts to slip. He starts screaming for help. Hanging on the side of the barn.
My mom walks by a window and see this. What she does is call us over to watch. (She figured out what the dumb bell did) We watch for about twenty minutes before she decides to go out and help. By the time she does this, he saved himself.
End of the story. Hope it helps. ^^
-Senko
Oh, I forgot to say thank you for the invite before I started an article! So, Thank you for the invite!
My Life was a mistake, so I can contribute a lot I think.
I'll give you quite a few when I can think of them.
I'll give you quite a few when I can think of them.
I got plenty to add to this. Though when making the decision initially it did not seem dumb at the time. Only after the crap hit the fan, did I realize how dumb I really was.
I make so many mistakes I can't keep track of them with my chaotic head. Perhaps if you were to accompany me and write them down? Makes me look important as well.
Thanks for the invitation, it will make a fine collection of fun.
Thanks for the invitation, it will make a fine collection of fun.
This Feedback was...
Thanks for the invite, really, really!
I am good for cracking wise when someone else does something kind of dumb, but I am going to try to work up the guts to come across with some of my own dopey mistakes, not right now though:)
Irishbard, I was in EMS, for a long time, I love how you put that, "one or two!" Very funny.
I am good for cracking wise when someone else does something kind of dumb, but I am going to try to work up the guts to come across with some of my own dopey mistakes, not right now though:)
Irishbard, I was in EMS, for a long time, I love how you put that, "one or two!" Very funny.
This Feedback was...
I work in the medical field... I can give you one or two! Though I promise to keep it PG... Thanks for the invite!
This Feedback was...
Heh. 5+ years of working in retail has given me a great deal of ammo for this one. Thanks for the invite!
This Feedback was...
Since my life is a "dumb" story it shouldn't be too difficult to come up with an idea or two.
Thanks for the invite.
Thanks for the invite.
This Feedback was...
Thx for the invite, all I can think of when I try to remember dumb things is the people in the Economics devision of my grade :P
This Feedback was...
well I have had a whole lot of dumb yet interesting things take place in my life so count me there.
This Feedback was...
Oh, I so belong here! There's so many idiotic events in my life, a stand up comedian could take notes and make millions! I'm in!
Travis
Travis
This Feedback was...
Thanks for the invitation! I want to take some time to read some of the stories -- hopefully I can think of something to add!
This Feedback was...
Thanks for the invite! i am excited to be a part of this, since it is my first WEbook project invite.
I just hope that I discover that I am not dumb for accepting the invite (LOL!) No really, I will think of something brilliant for submission very soon as soon as I take a look at what some other people wrote.
I just hope that I discover that I am not dumb for accepting the invite (LOL!) No really, I will think of something brilliant for submission very soon as soon as I take a look at what some other people wrote.
This Feedback was...
Thanks for the invite, I joined. :D
And this is my first project here, so you might have to show me the ropes. :)
And this is my first project here, so you might have to show me the ropes. :)
This Feedback was...
Thanks for the invite - now i'm off to take a look at the submissions ...
This Feedback was...
thanks for the invite. Sounds fun. I'll begin with reviewing though for now. I'm involved with a few projects already, and i'm spread a bit thin. x
This Feedback was...
Thanks for the invite. This is the first project I will have worked on. It will be fun trying to think of all of the dumb things that I have done in my life.
This Feedback was...
thanks for the inite..my only problem is sorting out which of the dumb things I have done (and there have been many) I should write about!
This Feedback was...
I love the idea! and ive already read quite a few entries in here, they're amazing! Thanks for the invite!
This Feedback was...
Thanks for inviting me
the reading of these stories should be good, I will see what I can come up with
the reading of these stories should be good, I will see what I can come up with
This Feedback was...
Sounds good, thanks for the invite! :D It oughta be hilarious reading these! :D
This Feedback was...
thanks for the invitation. I will try and think of something dumb, too. Uh!
This Feedback was...
Thanks for the invite! I'll have to think of some dumb stuff now... haha.
This Feedback was...
thanks for inviting me - lol i am sure i have some dumbness to offer lol - will give it a good go
This Feedback was...
Thanks for the invitation. There's just too much dumb stuff i've done, to sort out and put into words, but i'll give it a go!
This Feedback was...
Well, here goes nothing. I've never posted to anyone's project before, but I couldn't help but to tell one of my stories. I'm a poet, so story telling isn't my natural medium. I hope you get a giggle out of it.
This Feedback was...
Start Reading
more » Chapters
top
jump
more » Chapters
bottom
jump



